Am I a “bad girl” if I masturbate?
Questions like this often come with hesitation — a little curiosity, a little nervousness, maybe even a touch of guilt. And that’s completely understandable.
So if you’ve clicked on this article, it probably means the idea of masturbation has recently entered your awareness — maybe for the first time, or maybe in a new way. You might be looking for someone to talk to, someone who can gently tell you that this isn’t strange, and you’re not abnormal.
You’re in the right place.
Whatever you’re curious about, we’re here to talk it through with you—openly and without judgment.
Here’s the list you might be so interested about but don’t have someone to ask:
- Do other women masturbate? How common is it really?
Yes — very common.
Large surveys show that most women (around 70–90%) have masturbated at some point in their lives. That means this is a shared human experience, even if people don’t talk about it openly.
You are definitely not alone. You are part of the majority.
- Why do I feel awkward, like I crossed some invisible line?
This is completely normal — almost everyone feels it at first.
Most of us grow up in cultures or families where sexual topics — especially female pleasure — are hush-hush. So when you explore it yourself, it can feel like you’re stepping into a secret world. That awkwardness doesn’t mean you’re “wrong” or “bad” — it’s just a feeling we’ve picked up from society.
The good news? Communities like La Casa 18, and countless other spaces, are here to help change that. You’re not alone, and together we can make these conversations more open, honest, and supportive — including you.
- Does this change how I see myself as a “good girl”, a partner, or a person?
Absolutely not. Not in the slightest.
Sexual feelings and self-pleasure are just part of being a full, healthy human. Health experts and sexual wellness communities agree that masturbation is completely harmless, and something many people do — whether they’re single or in a relationship.
Your worth isn’t about whether you touch yourself — it’s about how you treat yourself and others.
And if you need some real-life proof, look at public figures like Grace Campbell, Amber Rose, or Janice Sequeira — women who openly encourage self-care and pleasure. I love reading their thoughts and watching their interviews, and I hope you’ll enjoy them too.
You are still you — just a version of you that knows herself a little better. And that’s a wonderful thing.
- Why do I feel like this is a secret version of me?
Because nobody handed you a map for this part of life.
Discovering it on your own can feel private, almost hidden. That’s normal. You’re just meeting a new layer of yourself — your body and desires. And that’s beautiful.
- Are there any scenes of masturbation in published movies or TV series that I would be able to watch?
Yes — there are published films and series that portray masturbation in a variety of ways (humorous, dramatic, honest). Examples include shows like Sex Education or Ginny & Georgia—watching these can help you feel “this is normal, people do this.”
But availability may vary by region and platform, so please check ratings and age restrictions for content before watching.
- Is there a correct way to masturbate? Should I use my hand, a toy, pressure, or movement?
There’s really no single “right” way — it’s all about what feels good to you.
Some people use their hands or fingers, some like toys, some like different pressures or movements. The key is simple: be comfortable, be safe, and pay attention to what your body tells you.
Think of it like learning a new recipe — you try a little, see what works, adjust, and soon you discover exactly what makes you feel good. Everyone’s body is different, and that’s perfectly okay.
- Do people in relationships still masturbate?
Yes! Many do.
Being in a relationship doesn’t turn off your body’s curiosity or pleasure. Masturbation and intimacy with a partner can coexist. It doesn’t mean you love your partner any less.
- Is it bad if I sometimes prefer my own touch?
Not at all.
It can feel easier or more direct because you know exactly what you like. That’s normal, and it can actually help you communicate your desires to a partner later.
- Why did it feel good at first, and then become too sensitive?
Genitals are very sensitive organs. After orgasm or long stimulation, they can become temporarily hypersensitive, which can feel uncomfortable for a bit, but it usually fades quickly — totally normal.
- Is it bad to do it often? Is it addictive?
There’s no set number for “normal”—it varies by person.
Masturbation is healthy as long as it doesn’t interfere with your daily life, work, or relationships. If you feel it’s taking over or linked to stress, it’s a sign to pause and maybe check in with a health professional — not a reason to feel guilty.
Big Sister Wrap-Up
If you’re shy about talking to anyone in real life, that’s completely fine. You’re not weird, you’re not dirty, and you are definitely not alone.
Masturbation is a normal part of discovering yourself — think of it like unlocking a new level in a game. You’ve just stepped into a new map full of hidden corners, little treasures, and secret paths that only you can explore. Others may have walked here before you, leaving hints and signposts, but the adventure is uniquely yours. And the best part? You get to go at your own pace, have fun, and enjoy every little discovery along the way.
A Little Question for You…
Now here’s a question for you: what little rituals do you have when you’re exploring your own body? Maybe it’s in your cozy living room with some intimate music playing, or even in front of the mirror — some people, like Amber Rose, suggest trying that once to really connect with yourself.
If you’re looking for inspiration, check out our recent blog post with a Lacasa18-curated list of intimate music to accompany your self-soothing journey — whether it’s a solo moment of discovery or a sweet, shared moment with someone you love.